oh my god
I hate Meg

she gave me a super big ole pepper

and it burned my tongue off

I can't eat

or drink

or like do anything

ouch

or talk.

ouch

it burns

Dang dang. I've been here since early, and there's no sign of my leaving soon. I've eaten junk all day. It's quite crazy. french Fries, cookies, and of course, OREO's. What had happend was, the whole volunteer database dissapeared from our eyes. Like damn. It was gone. No disk no nothing. All the schedules. Gone. Forever. So we get to redo the whole thing. A months worth of work. Woah. Nelly. Golly gee. Willikers, That's a doosie. this thing starts Thursday. Like for real. This is not kosher. Haha. We've been crazy killer bees all day. I'm sleeping good tonight. All that, and I had to transport 50 cases of wine to Marshall Field's to prepare for the party on Thursday, and yeah. Woah. I'm a tired mothersucker. I got my Staff T-shirt, and my Staff Badge today. with my picture on it. That makes me feel important, I actually hae 2 badges. One, that says INTERN, which means if something goes wrong, I don't get blamed for it, because I'm just a little INTERN, but the other is big, and RED, and says STAFF. AS ME ABOUT ANYTHING. IF SOMEONE DIES, IT'S MY FAULT. That's what it says. So yeah. I won't be wearing that badge. Oh yes I will, because it gets me and whoever I am with into whatever screening or party :) that makes me happy. So yeah. That's my day.

My life, so my life. Woah. It's been a while since the public has been informed of the woes of the phenomenon called my life. It's a fun times for all rollercoaster of crazinesss.

So I still have no money. That won't change for a while. haha. You know. That doesn't bother me though.

This is the exciting part. The Bizzoys. Allright. I don't know how many of them there are, because I don't know if they really count. It's a frazzled world. 80's frazzled.

Jonathan. Cool guy. Really cool guy. Say's "bitch Please" alot. That bugs me. haha. Not really, but you know, He used to play soccer. we all know what I think about Soccer boys. AMEN. He knows about soccer too. He goes to world cup games. He's a northwestern Junior, really smart, and real nice. He's very active, a member of a ton of clubs, and he does the whole works. I think I bug him in an odd way though. Like I don't know, but sometimes I think he thinks that I'm a little boy, because I talk to much. I should stop talking. Not like talking to him, but like talking so much. I don't want to stop talking to him. He's kosher.

Speaking of Kosher, there's Christopher. well Chris. He's jewish. Well he's converting to Judiasm. How hot is that?! I'll tell you. It's hot-tas-tic. Shit. Chris is a University of Chicago sophomore, and he's very culturally intelligent. Like he knows alot about alot. That's super duper awesome, because that means he has a brain. I love guys with brains. He's also tall, and has green eyes. Really pretty eyes. We've got (semi) similar tastes in movies, and he likes to drink. Like wow. I like a man who can hold his liquor :)~ that was stupid. I've got to go out with him more, because I want to pick his brain. Well more than that. Eww that was nasty. Picking someone's something? that just sounds uncomfortable.

Well that's that. I mean both are really cool guys. I just have to spend time with them to see where things go. I can't say I like one more than the other... Well, there are pros and cons. With both. I mean they both drive, both are smart, and yeah. I don't know.. We'll see.. I won't choose one over the other just yet..

It's an OREO and MILK night. Me, OREO's and a movie. Just us.

You're Most Like The Season Summer ...

Whoa.... Passionate eh ?? Typically you're a fiery,
zesty dominant person. As the hottest season,
you certainly ooze Sex appeal. You have
confidence which draws people to you, and you
have the makings of a good leader.
However sometimes your exterior is stronger then
you are and so you scare people off before they
can get close.

Well done... You're the most memorable of seasons
:)


?? Which Season Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

Four men got together to play golf one sunny morning. As they
were heading out to the course, one of them was detained by a
phone call.

The other three were discussing their children while walking to
the first tee.

"My son," said one proudly, "has made quite a name for himself
in the home building industry. He began as a carpenter, but now
owns his own design and construction firm. He's so successful,
in fact in the last year he was able to give a good friend a
brand new home as a gift."

The second man, not to be outdone, boasts how his son began his
career as a car salesman, but now owns a multi-line dealership.
"He's so successful, in fact, in the last six months he gave a
friend two brand new cars as a gift."

The third man brags that his son has worked his way up through a
stock brokerage firm, and has become so successful that in the
last few weeks has given a good friend a large stock portfolio
as a gift.

As the fourth man arrives at the tee box, the three smugly tell
him that they have been discussing how successful their progeny
are, and ask what line of work his son is in.

"To tell the truth, I'm not very pleased how my son has turned
out," he replies. "For fifteen years, he's been a hairdresser,
and I've just recently discovered he's gay."

As the other three recoil in horror, he continues, "but on the
bright side, he must be good at what he does, because his last
three boyfriends have given him a brand new house, two new cars,
and a big stock portfolio."

Ode to Mary

Oh dear Mary
how much I love you
you make me happy
when my world is sad and blue

even when i am chipper
you put my in a mood
that makes me quicker
than any old brood

you pick me up
when I am down
never a better friend
when you're around

I love to eat
when we're in company
it's always a treat
in dime or penny

your natural fragrance
appeals to my nose
prettier than any perfume
scent or rose

my thoughts are like gold
you are my muse
our time spent together
should be taped through and through.

though I can't have you every day
it's quite allright
because you'd be too much
and that's alot to pay

OH Mary mary mary
what a pretty name
you're my little fairy
and things will never be the same
-Christopher Guest

Maybe I should write poetry more often. I'm good!
Haha.

Guess what i did last night? Haha. Anyways. Time to start my day.

I HAVE CLEAN LAUNDRY!

Tired
is the
name
of my song this eve

I'm so tired
too tired to laugh
to drink
to pee

My eyes
are heavy
becuae all they
want is
sleep

Why? I got
rest the night
of last, but
as the day
passed
the energy
dwindled

down
o
w
n

to the ground.
and now
I don't want to hear
sounds

for I am tired.
and all I want to do

is sleep.

I gotta wake up for Gilmore Girls though

To: All Apple Employees
Subject: Shoe Size.
Hello! I know this is an odd request, but I need to find out what everyone's shoe size is please.

As you all know, the Chicago Marathon is the weekend of October 11th. This marathon is one of the largest and most famous marathons in the world.

With Niketown just a few doors away, we are definitely going to be BUSY as they are also sponsoring the event. The marketing team at Niketown has approached our store and asked if they could give every person a pair of Nike shoes to wear during the marathon weekend. Very cool, right?

Hence my odd request. Please email asap with your shoe size and we will get the ball rolling on this.

Hope everyone is doing well, talk to you soon!

Amy

We were up until 4 in the morning cutting each other's hair. I was about to sleep when Justin was cutting his hair. I said "hey Justin, if you let me cut your hair, I'll let you cut mine". That was stupid, because he accepted. I didn't want to really cut my hair. It was at a legnth where I liked it. It had just the curls that I wanted. Well, I sure did get it cut. I don't know if I like it this legnth, so I may have to go shorter. Here are pictures. Sad times. It looks good though. They all said I look older. I don't know.

Golly gee.

Yesterday I had a great day. Well it wasn't GREAT, but it was fairly okay. I started getting a cold. That's not kosher. Not at all kosher. I spent the morning with Monica, and the rest of the day with Laura and Olivia. We went to Chinatown, shopped around, and then we went to a resturant. Haha. Good thing I didn't eat anything. There were huge ass bugs in thier soup. They didn't notice until they were both done. At least they both got free late lunches. Then we walked back to my house, which isn't a long walk at all. Ben and his 2 friends were over, they asked us to go to the park. We obliged. We played Frisbee. It was quite fun. Sarah and Samantha left, so we we began to stroll back to my place when we saw a little gathering of people, and smelled food. It was a little thing for a lukemia thingy. They told us to join. Free food, ice cream bars and everything. It's hard to pass up free food. Too bad we didn't race that afternoon. Then we went back to my place. Chilled for a bit. Talked, had fun times, and yeah. So about 9ish, Daniel IM'd me and asked if he could come over, because he was going to see a friend who lived in my building. I was a little confused, but hey. I let him in. They went swimming. We watched Secretary. L, O, and I. Then Daniel and Robyn came over. I was disturbed. They were supposed to be with their friend. Not kosher. I got upset. There was no way I was going to let them stay the night. Nope nope nope. I mean they can be cool people, but I was not in the mood, and I'm getting sick. I was not feeling it last night. I just wanted to sleep. So they finially left, and yey. I got some sleep. L and O left with Ben at 7, and I slept more. Didn't talk to Chris last night, but I'm sure he actually has a life. Haha. Monica and I are going to look at bikes tomorrow. I'm going to see Hudson tonight. That's about it. Allrightythen. Latorgator.

100 questions. everyone should do this.

1. Full Name: Christopher Layne Guest

2. Nicknames: Opgwe, Christop, Hotness,

3. Eyes: Brown

4. Height: 5'7 ish

5. Hair: Curly Black

6. Siblings: 3; 2 Sisters Crystal and Christian, and one brother, Cameron

7. Do you sing in the shower? Of course!

8. Do you like to sing? You know it

9. Birthday: july 12 1984

10. Sign: Cancer

11. Where you live: Chigago Ill.

12. Sex: No thanks.

13. Righty or Lefty: Righty

14. What do you want most in a relationship? Fun times, happiness, share feelings, and a friend

15. Have you ever cheated on a test? Yes.

16. Marital Status: Single

19. Favorite Movie: That's like asking who my favorite roomate is

20. Favorite Song: Right Now: Milkshake

21. Favorite Book: Well, there's Sedaris, and now, I just got the new Dave Eggers book, so that's good too.

22. TV Show: Six Feet Under, or Queer Eye

23. Actor: Edward Norton

24. Actress: Maggie Gyllenhaal

25. Food: Macaroni and Cheese

26. Number: 3 It's the magic number

27. Cartoon: X-Men I guess

28. Disney Character: Can't beat Robin Hood

29. Color: Chartreusse

30. Do you plan on having kids? I can't wait, well, I can, but it's going to be awesome.

31. If so, how many? 2 or 3

32 Favorite names for your kids? Tristan Alexander, Kyan Spencer, and William Christopher. I haven't thought of girl's names. Kyan could go either way

33. How old do you want to be when you are married? Out of college.

34. Would you have kids before marrage? Unless I wanted to be a single dad

35 Do you have a b-f g-f? Nope

36. Do you like someone? I sure do. Maybe it's you :)

37 Music/TV: Musicand TV

38. Guys/Girls: Why not both? We don't need to discriminate.

39. Green/Blue: Both

40. Pink/Purple: Pink for polo's, purple for ties. Purple ties and blue shirts are HOT

41. Summer/Winter: Depends on my mood

42. Night/Day: Depends

43. Hangin' Out/Chillin': Kickin' it wit da homies

44. Dopey/Funny: Funny.

45. You know I'm around when you hear: Fun times for all

46. What school do you go to? Columbia

47. What year/what are you studying? Hiatus

48. What do you want to do with your life? Too much

49. How far would you go on a first date? Hopefully, not pass a kiss. Not full on making out.

50 Most blonde friend: Everyone has their moments

51. Nicest: same as above

52. Funniest: Maya, Scott, Justin

53. Tallest: Rohan, I think.

54. Best personality: That's what makes my friends awesome the are all DIFFERENT!

55. Which 6 people do you trust and are open with the most? Maya, Crystal, my Mom, Monica, Laura, and Olivia

56 What do you think of soul mates? Soul Mates. Sounds so "Dawson's Creek"

57. Do you have a soul mate? Of course

58. What was the last thing you cried or got teary about? Seven Little Rabbits

59. What's something about guys/girls you don't get? I don't know

60. Why? Why not? What?

61. What's an object you can't live without? Computaar

62 Love or lust: Lust can spawn love, but everyone has both, so it's all good.

63. Silver or gold: Platinum

64. Diamond or pearl: Diamonds and Pearls

65. Sunset or sunrise: Both

66. Have you ever gone skinny-dipping? Yes fun times!

68. Do you have any piercings? Twp

69. What song are you listening to right now? Milkshake

70. What's the last 4 digits of your home phone? 0462

71. Where would you want to go on your honeymoon? Somewhere different.

72. Who do you want to spend the rest of your life with? Myself, for starters. Couldn't live without me

73. What's the first thing you notice about the opposite sex? Look at those boobs! Please. I don't know!

74. Favorite sport? Soccer

75. What makes you happy? Friends.

76. What CDs are you going to get next? Steve Burns and something else

77. What's the best advice given to you? Don't let others get in the way of your dreams. you do what's right for you

78. Do you live by it? I'm doing my best

79. Have you ever won any special awards? Yes.

80. What are your future goals? Golly gee willikers. Too many

81. Worst sickness you've ever had? Not sure

82. Do you like funny or scary movies better? Dramas

83. On the phone or in person? Well both

84. Hugs or kisses? Hershey's in general is fine with me

85. What song seems to reflect you the most? "Beautiful" by India Arie, I don't know.

86. If you died tomorrow to whom would you leave everything you own? My family, and they could do with however they pleased

87. Do you have any enemies? Enemies? No, well not yet

88. Rich or famous: Depends.

90. Have you ever been in love? Haha Love is such s funny word. Nope

91. Have you met Santa? Not the real one, but I know someone who has

92. If E.T. knocked on your door holding up a peace sign and asked to use your phone, what would you do? I would say YEAH PLAYA'! And I would make him teach me how to to that finger light up thing. That's soo cool. And I would make him teach me how to make Reeses Peices fly.

93 When did you last talk to the person that you like? Last night...

94. Do you have any pets? Well, in my apartment, only Ben. Kidding.

97. Who sent this to you? Duncan

98.What do you think of this person? He's a purty cool guy

99. Do you want your friends to send back? No I want them all to post it on their blogs so I can read them

100. Who do you expect to write back first? I don't know.

You know that feeling you have, when you get the news that was destined to come, but it finally came, and you tried to brace yourself for it, but in the end it didn't help? Well that's the feeling I have now. I knew that chances were I'd have to take a semester off for fundage, but I worked my ass off to get it all situated. I mean it was always in the back of my head, but I didn't want to accept it. Now I have. It's not gonna happen. I know it's all set for The rest of school, but now it's not. I mean it's cool, because I do have a job, and it WILL get paid for, it's just that I NEED to be in school. I don't know. It's a letdown. At least I'll be working and keeping busy. Shit will get done. I can't tell my mom. She'll flip. Try to make me come home, but I can't. I won't. I musn't. I should go and try to salvage the night. Peace.

Hey hey hey!

THEY ARE HERE!

I spent all last night and today with them! We're about to go get items for their household. It's going to be beyond fun times. Last night was so awesome, I wanted to cry. Laura and Olivia rock my world. Almost like being back in good ole' Cary.

I'm hungry. Wonder what I'm a gonna eat. I really need my dad to call.

I got Dave Egger's new book, as well as Poppy Z. Brite's. Well I dind't buy them, I checked them out. I'll buy them when I get the moola. I just ain't got it yet! Amen holler.

I love my internship!

I'm about to GO CRAZY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay so I just got home from my first day as an intern... Not only do I get to be in the huge book, I get to:

EAT DINNER WITH ON OCTOBER SECOND: SALMA HAYEK, ED HARRIS, NICOLE KIDMAN, AND BENICIO DEL TORO
and that's not it.

More to Follow.

Got back from Fin. Aid. Theresa, my new advosor, rocks. She was so willing to help me. I've got school taken care of for the next two semesters, it's just the backpay I have to worry about. That's awesome. Everything going forward, is cool, I just have to make up for the past. I'm sure it's doable. I just gotta find the right outlet. The right solution. It's at the tip of my fingers, I just have to grasp it.

My day thus far

CHRISTOPHER wakes up, eats a bowl of cereal, complains about the earliness of the day. walks aound apartment aimlessly, goes into bedroom to see JOSHUA is up, mixing songs on the computer. After a restless night of sleep, all CHRISTOPHER wants to do is go back to sleep..

JOSHUA
where are you going?

CHRISTOPHER
I have to go to the Fin. Aid office, to see about more money options.

JOSHUA
Good luck.

CHRISTOPHER.
I know right?! Thanks.

CHRISTOPHER finishes getting ready, walks out into the elevator. He presses '1' to go to the ground floor. The elevator stops on 13. CHIPPER LADY steps in.

CHIPPER LADY
Well hello this morning! How are you feelin'?

CHRISTOPHER
Well.. I.. I.. I'm feelin'

CHIPPER LADY chuckles well at least you're feelin'. You're doing better than most at this hour of the morning. Most people are just mad and upset, can't open their eyes, you know, grumpy, just ANGRY at the world. she presses 2

CHRISTOPHER smiles gives off a shake of laughter
yeah, I know what you mean.

CHIPPER LADY
It's gonna be a good day, don't you worry baby.

CHRISTOPHER smiles
I sure hope so

elevator stops on 2

CHIPPER LADY
You have a great day, and you keep on feelin'. Don't be down hunny. smiles, nods head, and exits

elevator reaches ground floor

CHRISTOPHER now beaming, walks out of the elevator, ready to begin his day.

END.
keep on feelin' everyone.

I just had a thought. You know, alot of people, in hard times, just want to go home. That thought never crossed my mind. I mean it has, but it's been shot down every time. How can I get anywhere if I go back home? I have to go forward. Even if that means going to school every other semester, then that's what it means. I mean that's cool with me, because I'll be on my way sooner or later. Going back does nothing. Only forward from here. I'll figure something out, I know it. I have to. Every problem has a solution, no matter how hard, compicated, or intricate. Nothing is impossible.

I just saw Chris Padgett. Awww! We had fun times last semester. We're not taking any of the same classes this year, but that's cool. Hopefully we'll hang. I think I still have his number. What else? Oh yeah, tomorrow. 9 AM Appointment with Fin. Aid. For the gazillionth time. I'll be there every day this week. Time to put these hard-earned acting skills to use.

I'm never going to get a loan. As a 19 year old child, I have no established credit, so my score will be too low. My parents won't co-sign for me, so that sucks too. I've been to every loan place on the planet. I'm about to go crazy. I've been doing this for over a year, thinking someone will work with me. Nah. They won't. My school won't work with me, and the government should give me more money, because I'm me. When I rule the world, school will be free.

One little rabbit walkin' down the road.

I should call on old friend Toad. I have lots of friends that are having sex. A lot less that aren't. Sad. I want to have sex, but the V club still has my name on the agenda. I can't just drop trou and do it. I have to like the person. That's good though, because Spongebob Squaepants isn't funny. Fairly OddParents is though. I love Nickeloden. I have a huge sore, bump-like thing on my leg. I think it's either a bruise from yesterday, or something bit me, or something. It's weird. Rich got this cool mixer thingy. He's singing Aladdin, that reminds me of Zaidy, who had to go home yesterday, because she had an asmatha attack, and she doesn't have a doctor here. I should have a doctor here, but I don't. I'm hungry and my hand hurts. Not as much as it did, Jake gave me an exersise, and it works. He had a smashing night too. Not in the bad way. My friends don't call me back. Some friends. It's all good, I was too tired to go out last night. The 2 new Outkast songs that are out are really cool, and I just got 'Blue' by Joni Mitchell. I'm borrowing it from Danielle. I'm glad they live across the street. I have to go over there and help them pack. After I clean my house. Unpack rather. Help them unpack. What do you think about dating someone with the same name? Hannah sad it's just a name. I think she's right. I mean it won't happen for a while, if ever, but there's a possibility, I think. I need a massage. My dad hasn't emailed me. He was supposed to to it Friday, about this money thing I have to do, so I can pay for school. Jeff Smith hasn't emailed me either.. Oh well. I figred he wouldn't. If he does, it'll be a nice surprise. I want to go back to sleep, but that's unproductive. I need a new book to read. Randomness. This whole post, I know. OH yes, Becky needs to tell me about her date. She does she does. Chad should update and inform us on the Chadley Phenomenon. Golly gee willikers. I am out of it, but it's cool. because I don't know what it is. That's really funny. When people say they are out of it, but who ever said they were in it? Haha. I should stop using that term. Out of it. It's stupid, and makes me want to laugh at people. I'm smiling now. You know what? Why is Grimace the big Purple thing that's Ronald McDonald's friend called Grimace? I think it's because it's supposed to be a huge monster. I mean Grimace isn't a happy name. We all know what a Grimace is. That's not cool. I think his name should be... I don't know.. I don't know what his name should be. Maybe Grimace does suit him. I just realized I don't really have a role model. I mean I have people that I respect, and that are cool, but no one is my role model. Is that bad? I don't think so. I'm my own role model. That just made me happy. I don't have a role model! That's so amazing. I just had one of those self-actualization experiences. It was good. I'm happy now, and I can move on with my day. I should go eat something. Later.

It's weird what makes us happy.

Like Elle Woods says "Excersise gives you endorphins, endorphins make you happy. Happy people just don't kill their husbands".

I'm going to work out. Not because I'm sad, but because I have a pudge which is growing like an abnormal alien lifeform on my belly. Actually it's not that big, but we should nip the problem in the butt. Not the bud. The butt. Dave Eggers has a new Novel. I've GOT to get it. Anyone want to send it to me?

Christopher Guest
1212 South Michigan Ave. Apt. 1401
Chicago, IL 60605

I totally just put my address in my blog. Haha.

I think my other post just got gone. Hope someone read it. oh well.

I helped Sarah and Danielle move all day today. Fun, but tiring.

I hate it when I don't shave every 2-3 days. I become unpleasant.

Tomorrow I shall clean the house.

I'm about to go to the opening of H&M with Justin, and possibly Zaidy. Then I have to go to UIC to some party thingy. I don't really want to go, but I'll have fun regardless, I'm sure. I always have fun. At least I'll meet new people. You know, fun times for all! AFT is going to be in the GLBTQ Hall of Fame! That's awesome! I just got the email.

I start Tuesday at the Festival. Whaa Hoo!

I'm still looking for loans. Any ideas?

I cheated.. who wants to guess which one I got first?

Nemesis


?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

I should write a book.

Hello everyone!

We have the official dates for training. They are different from what I originally thought they would be, but I did let everyone know that there was that possibility. We had to switch dates to coordinate with our trainer’s schedule.

Here is the scoop:

Training dates: Saturday, October 4th – Wednesday, October 8th

Time: 9:00 am – 6:00 pm

Location: Apple Store
679 N. Michigan Avenue
(Employee entrance is located on Huron St.)

**On your first day, please bring 2 forms of I.D. (ex. Driver’s license and social security card) so that we can complete your new hire paperwork.

All you need to bring to training is yourself and willingness to learn and have fun!!

Please let me know if you have any questions or concerns!

Thank you,

Amy Smith
Apple Computer
North Michigan Avenue

What is this?! OCTOBER! That's two weeks after she told us!!!!!!!!! I had it all up on the calendar, and EVERYTHING! AHH! I MEAN DAMN! The Festival starts on the 2nd! What am I supposed to do!? I mean we need to talk about this!

Kellis-Milkshake:

My milk shake brings all the boys to the yard,
and there like,
its better than yours,
damn right its better than yours,
i can teach you,
but i have to charge

I know you want it,
the thing that makes me,
what the guys go crazy for.
They lose their minds,
the way i wind,
i think its time

la la-la la la,
warm it up.
lala-lalala,
the boys are waiting

My milk shake brings all the boys to the yard,
and there like,
its better than yours,
damn right its better than yours,
i can teach you,
but i have to charge

i can see youre on it,
you want me to teach the
techniques that freaks these boys,
it can't be bought,
just know, thieves get caught,
watch if your smart,

la la-la la la,
warm it up,
la la-la la la,
the boys are waiting,

My milk shake brings all the boys to the yard,
and there like,
its better than yours,
damn right its better than yours,
i can teach you,
but i have to charge

Once you get involved,
everyone will look this way-so,
you must maintain your charm,
same time maintain your halo,
just get the perfect blend,
plus what you have within,
then next his eyes are squint,
then he's picked up your scent,

lala-lalala,
warm it up,
lala-lalala,
the boys are waiting,

My milk shake brings all the boys to the yard,
and there like,
its better than yours,
damn right its better than yours,
i can teach you,
but i have to charge.

So I found out that I need a ton of money for school. It'll work out somehow. I'm working on loans, and hopefully I'll get some scholarships. If I don't, then I'll have to take a semester off or something. I don't know if I can afford to do that. I KNOW I can't afford to do that. not if I want to finish on time, with a double major. I'm already behind since I didn't take classes this summer, AND I'm taking only 14 hours instead of 19. Next semester I have to take 18 and 12 over the summer to catch up. I have to work out my stuff. I need about 8 thousand dollars before Sept. 22. Scary. Well, actually by like the 29th, because the first week never counts. The fin. aid guy sucks. he's not nice. He's nice to the other kids, and I need more help than them. It's okay though. I need hardasses in the world. They make me work harder.

Last night, I had another amazing night. Wow.

When you keep your pot levels under control, you don't tweak out like I did.

I didn't tweak out last night.

Red Kool-Aid is soo good.

I am really happy, inside, but I have to get money for school. I'm workin' on it.

I am so wrong

I don't think I can be any happier at this point and time. I just found the secret to my childhood. That's weird to say. But Every day at naptime, we used to listen to the SAME song. I have spent YEARS trying to find it, downloading it, or something.
Tonight is the night I have found it. With all the crap that went on tonight, I think tonight is the perfect night.
I will go cry now. I am so incredibly happy.
And no one is here to share it with me, so I IMed jake, so he knows.
Wow.
I can't explain my happiness.
Seven Little Rabbits, Walking down the road, walking down, the road, walking down the road, to call on old friend Toad...
AMAZING.
I am beaming.
Two nights in a row.

For a second, I took my blog offline. Now I don't see any harm. It was bound to come. It's amazing how the world sees things. The whole church knows now. There's nothing wrong with that. Only if they knew about the others... (wink wink) I just got off the phone with my mom, and she was livid. Haha. They thought I was living with a 'partner' of mine. Oh Peace. I love them alot. A whole lot, and I can't wait until we all get to Heaven, and are all worshiping regardless of our boundaries. It's amazing being discriminated against in everything in life, and the church is supopsed to be a place where everyone is accepted regardless. Yes, it's true, many of churches are, but some have alot of learning to do. Another thing. If my name was brought up in Session, and my blog, then why hasn't the church been trying to help me out? They know I have NO money, and that I can't afford college, yet they said not a thing about that. I mean if they did read my blog religiously (bad choice of words) then they would know that I have college that needs to be paid for. That's not the important thing. The important thing is that I can't kiss boys. Interesting. It's no longer important that we love God. I'm still going to talk to Jeff, and email him and everything. Can't loose anything.

"You can't change the world, but you can make a dent!"
-Sheldon Mopes, Death to Smoochy

OH NOW THIS IS JUST BEYOND THE LINE. THEY THINK MY BROTHER IS GAY TOO! OH MY GOSH!!!!! THEY SAID THAT THAT BECAUSE WE BOTH HANG AROUND GIRLS, AND WE DID THINGS IN A "FLAMBOYANT" TYPE OF WAY. I CAN"T GET OVER THIS!!

I don't know wether or not to leave my blog up or take it down!!!!!

I REALLY CAN'T BELIEVE THAT WAS SAID. THAT WAS CROSSING THE LINE. ON THE REAL

Woah. So people at church read my blog. I'm on the phone with Jeff Smith right now.

HE'S SAYING I'M IN A TROUBLED HOME! I'm really close to my dad now. Even closer than before. Weird huh? Too bad the majority of the gay guys I know are in perfect homes.

I am reccomended to stay away from the "gay friendly" churches.

For some reason I'm smiling, and another reason, I'm kinda interested to see what they have to say.

I have been smiling all day. It's great to be alive. I worte the following about an hour ago at Clark's. It doesn't make alot of sense, but I don't care. I jump from point to point too, but hey if you don't like it, then look in the mirror and smile.

Wow. I just had an amazing day. Some people may not think of it as amazing, just a regular old day, but I feel amazing today. I feel like more than money can buy. My day was just incredible. I woke up early, and I called the bank, and that bad stuff'll be worked out, and my job, and my internship is solid, and I met Carson Kressley, but that's not what made my day. Those things make me smile, and that helps, but the utter feeling of being alive is just awesome.

I love being me. For the first time in a long time, I don't want to be someone else. I love my life.

Then I went to Phil's for a dinner party. I still have a crush on Phil, he's still a hot toddy, but that's not what made my night. I met some awesome people, friends of Molly and Phil; Gabe, Mark, Yucrica (I think, I can't pronounce her name) and Rainy. I got along with them just great. It's like I knew them forever! It's the circle of friends anyone would want. I'm still making my tight knit of college friends, you know, friends I can really get deep, down and dirty with, and trust them with my life. I don't have that yet. I will. I can feel it. Laura and Olivia come home in ONE WEEK! I said home. I mean back. Let's just get through this week! It's totally awesome because I got to relieve my childhood with people I totally didn't know! It's so amazing what brings people together. X-Men. We talked about X-men for well over two hours straight. Enough said. Tonight I realized that I'm growing up. Not to fast, or too slow, but I am really changing. I can feel it, and I LOVE it. Sure, I still have alot to learn, but wow, I'm really feeling myself grow, and I like the person I'm becoming. As I sit here in Clark's all alone, drinking my chocolate shake, I have a spark inside of me. It's a warm spot. No one can put it out. I can't wait to get home and type all this out. I really do LOVE this city! It's AMAZING. All I need now is for my loans to be approved. I also think I've grown spiritually. This is hard to explain, for I haven't been amongst churchgoers, or religious people, but it's that spark that just tells me to let go and let God, or let them be. Live your life, and things will fall in place. Things will happen. It's taken care of. You still have to work Christopher, but you'll be allright. Don't worry. I feel inspired to do something, but I don't know what it is. I am listening to 80's music and it rocks. I think I'm coming more into myself. I like not being tied down in a relationship. Right now, it's not for me. I want one in the back of my head, but I'm not ready, I don't think. Emotionally I am, but Mentally, I'm not. I'm not ready for baggage. I want to see where this freedom I'm experiencing takes me. I've been smiling all day. I'm not tied down to anyone here in Chicago. No one knows enough about me to know me as well as my family and Best friends. I can be who I want to be without judgement. Not saying that my family or friends judge me, becasue they don't. Laura and Olivia are the closest things I have here. I know about all these people, and thusly feel close to them, but not like CLOSE. That's the difference. I feel like I really KNOW Maya, Cristina, Alanna, Bridgette, Hannah, even Melissa, and my family. I've had some really intimate moments with all of them, and we're bonded because of that. I like that I don't have that with the people here yet. I'm not ready for that. I have had moments with Laura and Olivia, yes, but everyone else, not really. I think I'm about to become really close with my roomates. I already feel alot closer to them than some of my friends. Well they are my friends, too, but yeah. I want my friends here to continue to tell me everything, and I want everything to stay the way it is. I like not revealing my feelings to some people. I really like it. I like only to tell my best friends and family what's going on inside of me. [And all my faithful blog readers]. Well, I'm about to go hang out with Justin for a little, and then go to sleep.

I love being me!

I JUST MET CARSON KRESSLEY FROM THE FAB 5 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I just got the call.

9.50 Starting.

Training next week.

DAMN.

I have changed the title of my blog. I was going to put the word poor in there, but I didn't, because

I got a job.

at Apple. HOORRRAAAYY! Well, Amy hasn't called me back, but when I went into the store, she said that she'd be calling today with excellent news. That's awesome. Made my day on Friday. Speaking of Friday, What else happend? TOO MUCH.

I got the internship at Cinema/Chicago. Yes, the Chicago International Film Festival.

I am to report to the office at 10 AM Monday, Sept. 22. I am the Asst. to the Volunteer Coordinator. I have to assist him/her in finding volunteers for the film festival. Hey. An internship is an internship. All I need is an in.

Now for a legnthy report of my weekend.

Friday night, I went out to the Cheesecake Factory with my roommates and a few friends. It was quite good. The Key Lime Cheesecake is really good. I was then supposed to meet Scott and Janielle at the Blue Line Addison stop. That stop was pretty far away from the Red Line Chicago. But I met them anyways. Well I didn't really meet them there. They got a free cab ride, for Janielle oogling her goodies for the cab driver. They text messaged me directions from the stop. I got there fine. The party was open bar. Yes, that's right. Free drinks for everyone. Every kind, every shape. Well not the mixed ones. Just hard liquor, chasers, and beer. I don't drink beer though, so we can all guess what I had. Yes, Liquor. Not in any small amount either. Friday, I totally violated all liquor rules. You know, don't mix darks and lights, blah blah. Yes. Guess who got alcohol poisoning? Christopher Layne. We won't talk about that part yet. Let's talk about all the things I did at this party. First, I made drunken calls. Damn Cell phones. They are a damn curse to mankind. I wouldn't have thought of making any phone calls of the sort if I was sober. Well Duh. I meant if I didn't have a cell phone. After the calls, there were boys standing in a corner showing off their chests. There was one guy, who was not particularly hot, but he had a semi hairy chest, and it was soft (of course I felt it) and for some reason it turned me on. Next to him was an ugly guy with a smooth chest, and I felt that too, but it wasn't that great. The hairy chest was mucho better. I guess they both have their pros and cons. Anyways, after that fiasco, (sometime in between shot numbers 20 and 23) there was a guy (totally straight [there were only about 6 gay guys there, and three of them were with me]) with his package hanging out. Yes. Out. In front of the world to see. I would have gotten turned on if it were a sight to see, but we'll just say it wasn't a sight to see, because there was nothing to see. Nothing at all. Erect, he stood at about three inches. Yeah. His testicles (that's a funny word) were bigger than his member. He was a sad case. Next, I will tell of the proceedings with this totally straight guy and my friends. Well, since he was showing the world what he had, I decided to tell the world what he didn't have. By the time the party was over, everyone knew he had a small rooster (or cock, if you like that term), thanks in huge part to muah. Well, I also found out that Janielle had made out with him earlier in the night. This made me laugh. Very hard. I grabbed Janielle's hand and urged her to look at the size of his member. She finially obliged, and looked. Then I started chanting. "make out, make out". They granted my wish and begun kissing. Scott, was there the whole time, feeding me shots, and egging me on. Janielle was strattling the guy, and Scott had his hand in between Janielle's legs, pretending he was touching the small penis. I then gasped, because Scott has a boyfriend. He told me to come here, and I put my hand in between her legs too, but I actually touched the thing. He got up from embarassment, and walked out of the room, and downstairs. Janielle followed to apologize for me. They ended up doing a deed in the alleyway. I took about seven more shots, and then we left, after I introduced myself to everyone at the party. On the way back to the train, Scott saw some friends from High school. They talked, and I proclaimed that I was bored, and was going back to the party. Janielle went with me. We got lost. So we called Scott, who found us, and took up back to the train station. The world was spinning. I had to sit down, or else I felt I would throw up. I threw up anyways. That was the first time. When the train came, instead of me getting up to get on the train, I rolled over onto the ground, right into my vomit. Oh yes. I was that drunk. I was shaking and convulsing too. Exciting. I then continued to throw up on the train. when it was time to switch to the Red Line, I kicked off one of my shoes, I don't know why. I guess I felt I didn't need them. So that was 45 dollars down the drain. When we got to the Red Line, and i threw up twice more, I kicked off my other shoe. 45 more dollars down the drain. We got on the train, and I just layed on the train floor. People couldn't get by me, and I wasn't moving. The train floor felt good, and cold. When we arrived at the house (not Mine, but Eva's, because Scott was housesitting their house) I threw up once again (making a total of 8 thus far). I then stripped naked, and went into the first bed I saw. That night I sweated profusley, and woke up drenched. I threw away my soiled clothes, and put on some of Eva's. I didn't have a bad hangover though, I just felt dehydrated, so janielle and I went to starbucks to get some Iced Tazo Passion Fruit Leamonade, which ROCKS. I looked for my phone. It was nowhere to be found. Scott called from work to say that Ben called him, and he had my phone. I went back to sleep. Woke up, took a cab home (becasue I had no shoes), threw up once more, took the GREATEST shower of my life, and went to sleep. Until 9PM. I then woke up to the phone ringing, and asking if I wanted to go to a Ben Fold's concert. I said yes, got dressed (I put on some kind of weird outfit. I would never go out looking like that if I were in my right mind) and commenced to go to the concert. It rocked. Ate Mexican food. Then went on a phone hunt. Rohan and I went all the way to Ben's house (which is not close to anyone but Eddie, who is not close to anyone else) to see that Ben wasn't there, but he had my phone, so Chris, his roommate let us stay there till we got a hold of him, which we did. He was all the way out by my house. WTF. we trecked all the way back, went, got my phone, joined Ben at a party (I was too tired to do anything, I didn't even want to be around alcohol, it makes me sick just smelling it) and then went home. I decided I wanted to go to church the next day, but I didn't get up in time, and no one would go with me. I slept, called my bank, realized there was a defficency, and there's NO way that there could have been (this story will come later) and watched movies most of yesterday, until about 11:00 when Mike and I decide we want to go out to the country and race around naked. That was fun and invogorating. Refreshing to say the least. Nothing went on, we were just two naked boys running around. Quite fun. I got home about 3 or 4AM, and went to sleep. Woke up, because I had to pay rent. The money was in my bank account, which like I said earlier, was defficient. SO, about an hour ago, I called my bank to learn that my last last paycheck from Madstone (not the one I just got, but the one before that, for an amount of $243) bounced. yes, it bounced. So I'm in the hole, when I should have a positive balance of close to $500 or so. But when I made a payment for school last time, the check that bounced, posted before it cleared, and I spent some of that money, which makes me in the whole for all of that money. My bank said they would clear all charges, and give me the balance I should have, when I get in contact with Madstone and figure the stuff out, and re-cash the check. My ass was livid this morning. I called Madstone Corporate, and left a legnthy message. They better return my call. Good thing the rent Manager is off today, or I would be on fire. Now, I'm letting it all go in this blog. I'm about to go back to sleep, and then do the dishes. Later.

OH yes, and I had to change my school schedule. I hope these classes aren't filled. I already can't take 19 hours like I want to, because of this internship, so I cut it to 14. The schedule I have now ROCKS, and gives me time to Go to school, do the internship (at 40 hours a week) and work. I'm going to be a busy puppy, but I have to do it. I have to.

Monday: 9-10:50 ~ Spanish. I decided to take Spanish. I don't know why yet.
Tuesday: 9-12:50 ~ The Physics of Filmmaking. 2-3:15 ~Philosophy
Wednesday: 9-10:50 ~ Spanish
Thursday: 2-3:15 ~ Philosophy
Friday: 10-1 ~ Avd. Screenwriting I

It's not a bad schedule at all, and I am taking more 2 day a week classes instead on blocks, because the blocks are at bad times. That sucks, but I'll be able to get everything done.

Today is Josh's birthday. Happy Birthday Josh!

Money from my dad was supposed to arrive today, and it hasn't. Not good.

I can't go out tonight, if I have no fundage.

I think I look pretty good today. That's a good thing.

I can't wait to have a dern job!

Sometimes it sucks being the person who everyone tells shit to. I found out recently that a lot of my friends don't like another one of my friends. Yet, they put up with him. I mean golly gee. What's up? It's like why don't you tell them that? Why me? It's like I'm supposed to solve everyone's problems. Fuck that shit. I mean I love that my friends can confide in me for stuff, but still. I have to appease everyone. It's like "oh you can come, but don't bring so and so" I'm thinking "what the fuck?!" (I'm trying to stop saying 'like' all the time") Or they are like "well I really don't like so and so, that's why I don't hang around ya'll as often". Stupid shit like that. I say fuck 'em. Fuck 'em all.

On a lighter note, I have my second interview at H&M on Tuesday, and my interviewer guy was hitting on me.

I told myself I would be in bed by 11.
all that changed.
one simple movie.
that I used to hate
now has new meaning.
how I could hate it I don't know
it's amazing.
I'm different from what I used to be

weird that I'm noticing it now.
but Chocolat is so incredible.
not to mention Johnny Depp.
it's 1:10 and now I shall sleep.

goodnight.

tomorrow I will make one person's life happier.

Guess who called me?!

Phillip!

Hooray! He invited me to dinner on Monday night at his house. Oh yeah. I know, it's prolly a big gathering, but hey, he called. Previews for his show start Friday, and continue for a week. I'll go to one, and bring Caitlyn or someone. I'm going to apply at H&M tomorrow.

what an uber boring day. slightly productive, but not really. I did nothing. Shit. I meant to call my mom. But time just flew from me, and I didn't do a damn thing. what's up with that? I'm drifting away into nothingness. I left my house twice today, and I wasn't outside of my house for more than an hour's time total. That's ghetto ghet. I wonder what I'm going to do tomorrow...

I think I'm going to go to bed.

I want someone to call me.

Click
here to take the test.

Boy Meets Boy fucking sucks.

Why are you interested in an internship at the Chicago International Film Festival?

What do you know about Cinema/Chicago?

What do you hope to acheieve bt completing an internship at the Chicago International Film Festival?

Have you ever attended any film festivals or art events with over 50,000 attendance? If yes, what do you consider to be the three most important aspects, which will warrant the success of the featival?

What are your career goals (as you imagine them at this point in your life)

What would you say are some of your strengths and weaknesses?

How are you at dealing with diverse (i.e. difficult and different) personalities?

What previous work or academic experience do you have that might help you as an intern at the Chicago International Film Festival?

How do you feel about sometimes working under deadline or in a stressful environment? The office has an "uneven" environment at times- mundane work during "down" times, and then suddenly, an atmosphere of urgency, where you may be asked to take full responsibility for a project. How do you feel about taking such a responsibility?

What are some of your favorite films or directors?

Please list your computer skills.

What is your availability? How do you feel if required to work excessive long hours?

Yeah, so I'm online, and myslef IM's me. I don't have a problem with that, if I saved my password, that's cool. I don't care. What I'm weirded out about is, I signed onto my other screen name (since I do have waay too many, 4 to be exact) and I see my old buddy list. I also see who's on it. Yes. None other than Mr. David R. It's really sad that someone can't tell me to my face that they don't want to hang out. I mean damn. He blocked me. I never do that. What did I do? Now this has gotten me all tied up in knots.

I had a dream that I need to transfer to a school in New York. I don't know why, but it said that's where I need to be. Kind of Field of Dreamsish. ya know "go the distance" or "if you go there, everything will come". I also had a dream about the Film Festival. That's how I got to NY in the first place. I got hooked up with someone there. Weird, I know. Me and my dreams. I am going to look into it though, for the heck of it.

I had an AWESOME time in the burbs yesterday and today. IKEA is my most favoritest store in the world. wowsers. that's about it. Oh yes, and another cool thing! So remember how I said the thing about the guys? Well, I have seen a ton of hot guys, and I'm not attracted to any of them.. It's amazing. I am really doing this! Yaay!

So Justin took me back to the city tonight, and yaay fun times, I went to Ben's house, and it was fun, I think. Everyone was drunk out of their minds. I didn't drink a thing. Nor did I smoke, I had a can of Sprite, and some chocolate cake. I made out with two girls. They both got really turned on. Caitlyn is a good kisser. As is Helena. I think I have stumbled onto something. I can't say that I didn't like making out with those two girls, and one of them is a lesbian! Helena had to stop us, because it wasn't right that she was getting turned on. It was quite interesting. I have made out with girls before, but it was different tonight.

Now I am housing seven drunk and or high people. Good thing my roomates aren't home. They are waay too loud. Not the roomies, the people over.

IKEA rocks.